I am a very attractive man. Clarification: a very attractive OLD man. Technically middle-aged, but to a young person anything over 30 is old.
So this is very much an “old man yells at cloud” post. And while I am a bona-fide zaddy (just ask Toots!), I also hate when things are loud, go to bed early, and prefer not to drive at night.
We are in an age where everyone is a performer. Anyone can turn their phone around, hit record, and put on a show. You can sing, dance, and do anything you want and the internet provides an instant audience.
And I think that’s great. The road to stardom is more inclusive than ever. Many a rich young person has been made on Instagram Live. Smart and wealthy influencers are born on YouTube every day. Apparently something called TikTok is popular but I refuse to learn what that is.
All this means is people now have to “perform” more. You have a social media presence or you’re an outcast. Which is tough on young people. Not only do you have to deal with the daily and annoying business of being a person, you gotta have a schtick that gets clicks.
One of the performances that always gets internet action is the angry sports fan. Nothing goes viral faster than a smashed TV after a loss or a jersey burning in hate. It doesn’t have to be rational, it just has to be ridiculous.
It’s like a Michael Bay movie only worse. Like someone with even less character instinct than Bay trying to make a Michael Bay movie.
No one in Mets internet fandom; an absolute ocean of negative fuckery; represents this better than a fella I’ll call the Fallen, in reference to Michael Bay’s 2009 disasterpiece Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.
The Fallen works for a well-known and disgusting sports media company. After every Mets loss and often after wins, the Fallen records himself yelling, screaming, and shaking with anger. The Mets, who when I last checked were just a bunch of dudes who play baseball, are pathetic and feeble.
Feeble? Imagine looking at Starling Marte or Francisco Lindor and calling them feeble. In what universe is Pete Alonso pathetic? How on god or science’s green earth can you call Jeff McNeil feeble? He won the NL batting title last season and more importantly, he’s Jeff fucking McNeil!
The Fallen is troubled. We all are. Everyone is going through something. Life is way too complicated and a pain in the ass. He needs help. But not the kind that come from clicks.
So don’t click on the Fallen. Let him writhe into the night and don’t engage. The attention is the power so don’t turn on the lights.
Not because we’re “better” than the Fallen but because we’re better than just hate. Nothing that means anything was ever built on hate. The stuff that lasts comes from the opposite of that.
I love the Mets and love doesn’t mean “never having to say you’re sorry.” What the fuck does that even mean? It’s a dumb line from a bullshit movie.
Love means accepting and appreciating everything about what you’re loving. Even the stuff that sucks. Like Daniel Vogelbach’s braids.
So as a Mets fan I choose to love Daniel Vogelbach’s braids. Just like I love when David Peterson gets lit up and can’t make it through the 5th inning. It’s not my style but this is what I signed up for.
The internet is a dark, savage, and ridiculous place. Mets fans can be a pessimistic bunch. But there are plenty that bring light. So to all the positive Mets fans out there, I see you and I love what you do. You’ll get a few clicks from me.
Notes From the Last 7 Games
The kids are alright. Brett Baty is hitting .311 and looks comfortable. Francisco Alvarez, who also has to navigate catching in the big leagues and dealing with a new staff, is getting there. The bottom of the lineup is starting to look dangerous.
The rest of the lineup is not dangerous. Nimmo and Alonso have gone cold and so has the rest of the team. Lotta guys swinging out of the zone and getting themselves out. Usually means guys are pressing.
The starting staff has been historically bad. Literally one of the worst staffs in the history of the organization. It’s almost a miracle the Mets are still over 500.
A 16-15 record has us 5 games back in the division and on the outside looking in for the wild card. It’s still early though. So no panic and stay positive. We’ll get em’.
#LGM #LFGM
5/4/23
